reasons I'm happy ...

Reason #1: I quit smoking.

Yes, I did. After 6 months of it, I woke up yesterday morning and decided not to smoke anymore (and being a genetic mutant who experiences no nicotine withdrawal, I'm perfectly fine without the little feckers). I'd been thinking a lot the last few days about my ways of dealing with stress, and how incredibly unhealthy ALL of those ways are. It started, I think, when I was chatting Friday night with K (who knew I was trying/thinking/intending to quit), and he said ..

"Girl, I can hear that cigarette going."
"Shut-up." said I, "Don't bust me, man."
"It's ok, after the week you've had, you deserve it."

I believe I laughed in response - and I adore him for saying that - but it got me to thinking over the weekend ... what do I deserve? After everything I've been through in the last few years - all the work I've been doing on myself ... do I still believe I deserve to suffer? Am I still married to that mindset? And then the whole thing got very existential, which I won't bore you with .. but the point is, I don't want to do this anymore. I just don't want to keep going back to hurting myself every time a little something stressful crops up.

Life is drama - unfortunately - so I can't afford to wait around for things to be all sunshine and roses before I change my relationship with myself. I can't wait for my mom to have better health before I stop destroying my own. And I have to stop letting myself indulge in this fantasy that simply because I can be in control of inflicting suffering on myself (in one way or another), that I am somehow in control of the uncontrollable aspects of my life.

Reason #2: My new *FREE* purse arrived this morning <span class=

Reason #3: Yesterday while my dad and I were at Wal-Mart (or as I like to call it, Mal-Wort) I picked up some fabric to make slipcovers for the two heinously ugly sofas we got from the Goodwill for the dogs (hey, dogs are people too - they need furniture too .. plus having their own, keeps them off things they shouldn't be on). I have no pattern at all, other than the sofas themselves - but I have the idea from watching a ton of DIY shows on HGTV that all I need to do is cut out a few dozen vaguely appropriately sized pieces, and then take 53,000 pins - work a bit of 'sofa-tailoring' magic, and bingo bango = slipcovers. We'll see wink

I picked out two fabrics:

(they're actually much prettier than this - but I was too lazy to take a nice pic, so I just scanned them in and it seems not to have done them justice)

My plan, at the moment, is to use one fabric as the main slipcover, then use the other fabric for the cushions - and then do that in reverse on the other sofa so that they coordinate but not in a matching way (I hate things that are matchy-matchy unless they're perfectly symmetrical). But I may change my mind after I get into this - I don't want it to be too busy. Then there's a red chair that I want to slip cover to protect it from the dogs, and there'll soon be another sofa since my mom is going to send back her hospital bed - so eventually I'll have to cover those in something else. But for now - this is going to be a big enough project - the hardest part of which, I suspect, will be getting the dogs off the sofas long enough to get this done, LOL :)

Reason #4: Bought a cute little wallpaper border for the kitchen - normally I suspect wallpaper borders of being the tools of Satan, but it was so cute - and the kitchen's so drab as it is - that I just couldn't help myself.

Look:


See how my hands were tied? LOL wink

I promise before and after pics of all the projects - but don't expect them anytime soon .. I'm both busy and lazy - a deadly combination, ROTFL!

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