the unbearable weight of being an eggplant (the heavily edited version)

Someday in my life I will have to write something set in a non-a/c placated heat wave. People who work in law enforcement, emergency response, medicine, etc.; will attest to the fact that people get crazier in full moons and heat waves. I'm not making this up -- this has been anecdotally proven!

I am hot, tired, prone to grumpiness (mostly because of reasons 1 and 2), and slowly but surely I'm losing touch with my crutches. Spending time here at the computer has been cut to a minimum since losing the a/c in this room (therefore, my great purgative; writing, has come to catastrophic halt), and sleeping is really only possible from about 3am to 7am (otherwise my room is a sauna). So, I'm about ready to tear my hair out -- and for no other reason than the fact that it's there. On top of those things, there's a general stirring in my blood. Something is malignantly restless in me lately. I say malignant because restlessness is never a benign state in people like me. I say people like me -- because, well, that's what I mean. What is a person 'like me'? Oh you never should have asked that! LOL

I've never thought I was better, though I have frequently been convinced I am worse, but I see now that better and worse are vapid labelers for things that are simply different. Some apples may be better than others, some oranges may be worse than the rest, but you cannot really say an apple is better than an orange (unless your trying to bake a pie). Maybe some people are apples, some oranges, some papayas, some, perhaps, are guavas. Personally, I'm convinced I'm an eggplant. Which isn't to say that I don't love all the other fruit -- but it is to say that sometimes, even though I shouldn't covet the lot in life of others; I'd kill to be an orange.

What is the role of an eggplant in society (besides being yummy in parmigiana)? Hell if I know. All I know, is that there is this indescribable urge to constantly whisper in dialects understood almost exclusively by other peripheral fruit -- you know, the fruit that most people don't recognize as fruit. There is a longing for communion, and a tremendous relief when connection is established. I think there's something about being an eggplant or a cucumber that a banana will never understand. Something about growing in the soft earth, rather than from a tree limb like 'normal' fruit. Something about that obtuse little angle that means everything is always going to be seen just a few degrees out of the norm.

So, to all my crazy little eggplants (you know who you are). May the universe bless you with all that you need to make it through another day. May the sun shine long enough to encourage you, but not so long that it splits your purple skin wide open. May the rain fall often enough to quench the thirst you feel at the roots, but not so often that you are forced to wallow in the mud. May the wind blow strong enough to feel like a loving touch, but never so hard as to carry you off to the next county. And may the judges smile kindly upon you at the local fair -- and if they don't give you a ribbon, know that you're still gonna be yummy in someone's tummy!

BTW, I had this sort of jumbled mess inside my head, and I thought if I started writing a blog about it, it would eventually come to fruition (no pun intended!). Instead, I'm not entirely sure what I'm trying to say, LOL

Sleep deprivation, dehydration, and angst are apparently never good bedfellows ;P

NOTICE: @5.02 pm I came back and cut this post down to size, both for the sake of clarity (on my part) and sanity (on your part).


La Yen said...

I think I would like to be a plucot. But not a "dinosaur egg" plucot--that is just cheap.

Anonymous said...

brilliant!! Thank you for putting that so well! I have often thought of myself as a side dish or condiment that made the main course look and/or taste really good!

LuluBunny said...

La Yen -- Que es un plucot? I thought I knowed lots o' them thar fancy type words -- but now I'm a feelin' like an eedjit for sure! :)

Anon - Thank you for the compliment, but you didn't tell me which condiment you feel like. I would aspire to be a mango chutney -- but am probably more along the lines of rancid pickle relish, LOL:)

Anonymous said...

Ha-Ha-Ha!! You are wayyy too fancy-schmancy for me (although, in my day dreams I totally know what mango chutney tastes like)but in my REAL life as a mom of three, wife of the fourth, part time health unit coordinator, housewife,
taxi driver, church nursery worker, sister, friend, neighbor....most of the time I feel like uummmm.....Ranch Dressing
Most people like it, it tastes good on just about everything, kids like it, people count on it being there, it's a staple, you can almost always rely on it to satisfy......yeah, I'm pretty good with being ranch dressing. Is that overly simple? anonymous (also known as b.)

LuluBunny said...

Hey B,

I love Ranch Dressing (the more, the better). Nothing overly simple about that :D

b. said...

Thanks.....and I still think you are brilliant! Can I be your "cheersistah"? Or "cheerstranger friend" I hear from the young women in the ward that being a "cheerleader" is now a joke (funny, but when I was their age I would have ddiiiied to be one of those!!)So, whatever..
you just keep writing and I'll just keep being inspired! b.

LuluBunny said...

B - consider yourself officially drafted as my #1 cheersistah, believe me, I could use one! :)

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